We’re going to be talking about making excuses and it is the easiest way to let fear take the wheel 🚗 in your life.
So many times people talk about being your true/authentic self. This is one of the hardest things to allow ourselves to do.
Because we fear 😨 other people will not accept our true selves. This is really just a mirror reflecting our own thoughts.
Like the biggest fear we have is whether or not we will like/accept 💜 ourselves.
I asked myself--Who do I truly want to be and why do I feel like I am fighting who I want to be?
I didn't know who she was. Well, I don't want to say I didn’t know who she is.
We have this ideal 💡 version of who we would like to be; based on the morals, life lessons, character, beliefs, habits, and values, etc. that we all have.
And the hardest thing for me is--
How do I start to become this person?
Like the traits I want to have are not 🚫 habits that I currently exhibit.
I have this idea of how to start- but I am terrified 😫 to follow through with it because then that would mean stepping outside 🟪 of my comfort zone. Living in comfort will usually keep you stuck far more than it will let you succeed.
I remember as a 👧🏻 kid, truly just living in the moment and not caring about the person I was. I wasn’t afraid of what my peers thought 🤔 of me as a child. I just did me.
When do we allow those fears to manifest and grab us so tightly 😈 that we shove our happy selves back into a corner to keep her safe from the cruelty of the real world?
So it made me really think...
What excuses am I making that are limiting me from being the Me I loved once so deeply?
Making excuses, what I have found, is the brain’s way of keeping you safe from the fears that you are not ready to face, or the possibilities/successes that you can attain.
So, our brain has the power to try and keep us safe. It remembers things on a mental and physical level. 🤯
For example, I have been terrified of failure in so many ways; failing as a mother, business owner, wife, daughter, and friend. But really what I was doing was failing to really trust and honor myself.
It was easy to make excuses so that I didn’t have to show up for myself. It was easy to turn around and say you know what I am not going to do this because of x, y, and z.
It is easier to make excuses because instant gratification won’t be attained. Something that takes time ⏲ to do seems so much harder to follow through with- because most of the time it forces us to work with our fears and shadow selves. 👤
They’re not necessarily the easiest people to walk 👣 with.
What making excuses was trying to do was protect me. But it was trying to protect me from an outcome that had never played out. It has also allowed me to live my life with anxiety at the forefront.
I would make an excuse, and I still sometimes make excuses for certain things. For example, I have stopped 🛑 getting on my spin bike 🚴🏻♀️ which is something I absolutely love. I stopped doing it because I was afraid to allow myself to be the person that I have pictured in my head.
We all have this “perfect self” in our brain 🧠 and we are afraid that once we get there that we will not live up to the hype 🎉 we have had in our minds.
Now, full transparency, I am not skinny, I am overweight, and very well aware of this fact.
A lot of people don’t know my true weight but are shocked to know the number. I don’t let that define me yet, I was terrified of letting myself become this person who is fit and healthy.
I know it is 💯 attainable, but I am terrified of what that would look like. Because I grew comfortable with who I am now.
I have been making excuses because I don’t know how I will feel about myself once I reach that goal and follow through with completing that goal.
That is insane to think. That I won’t like me when I get to the version I picture of myself. Because I am still thinking 💭 of what others will think of me.
Excuses can come in many different forms, but the “making excuses” that I am talking about are the ones where you 🚫 don’t show up for yourself because you don’t think you should or you are afraid of what she will really look like.
It is easier to say “yes” to everyone else because that allows you to make excuses to say “no” to yourself.
But what about saying “yes” to yourself?
What is so scary 🧟♀️ about saying yes to yourself?
Write some of these questions down & reflect on them.
What excuses are you making up in your head for fear of the outcome? For fear of something that hasn’t played out yet?
What are you afraid will happen? Are you afraid you’ll lose yourself?
I’ve already lost myself; I knew who I was and what I wanted, but I was afraid of starting my journey to becoming her.
We say we don’t have time to do the things we want to. Yet, here we are scrolling Facebook and Instagram 🤦🏻♀️ (guilty)... We do this because that allows us to stay in our comfort zone and not push ourselves outside of it because we fear who we truly could be. We don’t want to put in the effort to see the results we want. 💪🏼
Putting in the effort means we are walking in front of fear.
It is an unknown. The unknown scares us. Trust me, many people fear the unknown. Especially when it comes to being intuitive, or speaking with Spirit. So, we sit with the known results and just keep on going, because we don’t want to entertain the reality of our ideal version.
I, personally, have taken a leap 🏃🏻♀️ of faith because taking the journey to find her has been so much more fun and rewarding than sitting with fear driving my bus. Like I am the only one allowed to drive my bus 🚌.
I wasn’t sure if I would like her, and that is okay to feel that and not know if you will like that person you are working towards because you don’t know that person yet.
You’re working towards that person and you can pivot. Take the iPhone for example; Apple continually works to edit their ideal version of the phone for you. So you can as well!
We could sit here and not work towards that ideal version and that is so much easier because then we didn’t fail.
For the longest time, I let other people dictate 🗣 who I was based on their opinions and beliefs of me.
Without truly listening 🦻🏼 to myself.
We all have this ideal version of who we would like to be and she may not meet your current ideals for you, but she isn’t the you that you are right now. She is the future “you”, begging 🙏🏽 you to challenge yourself to meet her.
So what is standing in your way from meeting her? Do you want to let fear drive your bus, or do you want to take the wheel?